Monday, May 26, 2008

Foursquare Convention Update

Last night, I hung out with Bob Penberthy & Tim Mossholder, along with Tim's 2 boys, Brennon & Braden. Bob had rented a car and they were headed for a grocery store, which was good for me too.

It was a blast of a trip, as Tim had his iPhone on Google Maps and I had my AT&T Tilt on Live Search. In our search for a Wal-Mart, both maps had it wrong, so we were quite a crew. It was a night of wrong turns and dead ends that had us all making memories.

After a good night's sleep, today was mostly restful, kind of gearing up for the gatherings. As an introvert, while I enjoy seeing everyone, it tends to be kind of draining.

You can try to be yourself as much as possible, and I think I do pretty good at it. It's still quite something when you attend these events and your colleagues ask, "How's the church going?" That almost always means, "How many are you running?" or "Is it growing numerically?"

If it is, you struggle with the urge to clarify what that means. If it's not, you struggle with the urge to clarify what THAT means.

I want to be able to say, "That shouldn't be", but the fact remains that it is what it is. Pastors are people too, and the desire to be deemed "successful" is just as strong in us as it is for anyone who is not a Pastor.

What it means for these gatherings is that each person/pastor has to identify what's really important in terms of relationships and what qualifies them, and then go with it. There are some people who are going to ask, "How are YOU?" I try to be one of them, knowing that I'll be asked the previous questions and will have to roll with it.

I sure hope I don't sound cynical by that. I don't feel cynical or sarcastic. I just know that I am trying to become, and I think am becoming, more and more honest with who I am, who God has made to be, and how He has made me to operate in the realms of relationship He's graced me with. This family called Foursquare is one of those realms, and I do love and appreciate it. I try to also not expect more of this relationship (or set of relationships) than it can, or is even supposed to, give.

Hope that all makes sense. Feels a little like too much rambling. Feel free to tell me if it is!

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